It Feels Good to Be Bad
Are You Breaking the Rules? Maybe You Should Be
If you’re wondering if this is an April Fools post . . . It’s not. I’m seriously going to talk to you about why you might want to start being BAD.
And it DOES feel good to be bad, doesn’t it?
OK. Full disclosure.
I’ve recently started watching Breaking Bad (I know, I know, late to the party again, lol.) and it’s so good…so surprisingly relatable.
The transformation of Walter hits you right over the head. The guy starts out as a dead man walking. And we watch as he’s pushed past his fear over and over again. He “Breaks Bad.”
And each time he is pushed, each time he responds outside of convention and expectation, Walter becomes more fully alive.
Let me be clear.
Do. Not. Start. Cooking. Meth. In. Your. Minivan. (Or kill people. Of course, don’t kill people.)
That’s not the kind of bad I’m talking about. There are other kinds of bad that bring us to life.
And they’re less about Breaking Bad and more about breaking RULES.
To be specific, breaking the rules you’ve created that are based on what you’ve been taught, cultured, and judged into thinking you HAVE TO conform to, but DON’T ACTUALLY BELIEVE.
We rarely ever step back enough to even notice we’re following these rules, much less challenge them.
Let me get you thinking a bit. Below is a list of rules I hear and see often.
WARNING. This is not your first rodeo. When you read the list, your mind may tell you that you already know these things are not true, that they are not real rules. Take a moment to reflect however. Ask yourself how you behave when faced with them, how you feel when you’re confronted by the opportunity to not conform to them…
Don’t wear white after Labor Day (And countless other laws of fashion).
A loving partner remembers your anniversary.
Children should be seen and not heard.
Blonds have more fun.
Good girls never…
A good mother always… (Thinking about yourself as a mother OR as daughter here. If you’re a parent, I encourage you to do both.)
People work from 9 to 5.
A person’s value is measured by their… (Appearance? Bank account? Education?)
A good (husband, wife, girlfriend, boyfriend,)… (Fill in anything you think they’re supposed to do or be.)
It’s not polite to ask for more. (Or to ask for anything.)
Certain bits of your body are meant to be covered up.
What other RULES can you come up with?
What if 60 year old women wore tulle skirts?
What if the kid who hates (or just tolerates) sports got to do something else with his free time?
What if you sailed your boat naked?
What if the bed didn’t get made?
What would happen if you started to break a few rules?
Rewrite your Rule Book
If you haven’t already, jot down all the RULES you can think of. Use the list above to get you started.
Take a good hard look at the list and ask yourself:
- How do you behave when faced with each?
- How do you feel when you’re confronted by the opportunity to not conform to each? (Or when others don’t conform to your version of this rule.)
- To what degree to you actually believe in this rule?
Pick one that really stands out. Rewrite it in a way that feels deliciously bad.
Push past the fear and DO IT!
BONUS: If there’s someone you love that doesn’t conform to your version of a rule, try accepting their version. You may be surprised at what happens!